Just because you’re staying single doesn’t mean you are lonely. Whether you’ve always been single or just left a relationship doesn’t matter. You will no doubt dodge many invasive questions from friends and family members.
While these prying family and friends mean well, you can remain a party of one and still be happy. A motto to live by is that it’s better to be single than to waste your life with the wrong person.
Recent statistics report that about 50.2 percent of people in the United States are single, which is more than double the percentage in the 1950s. Of course, some of these people are widowed or divorced or are in a relationship but live separately. However, some are just enjoying their independence without a significant other, which is completely acceptable.
THE PRESSURE TO MARRY
The norms of American society and gender roles have slowly evolved over the past centuries. In the past, men and women stayed in the traditional roles that were expected. Men learned a trade or studied for education to work and provide for a wife and family.
Women were expected to marry early to a man of means and bear his children while running the household. Even in the early 1900s, women who weren’t married by the time they reached 21 years old were considered old maids, a derogatory term that’s hardly used these days. However, neither female nor male schoolteachers at the time could be married. Single women also considered religious vocations, such as becoming a nun.
The pressure wasn’t as harsh for the single men. Confirmed bachelorhood was often viewed as a badge of prestige. In higher positions of society, men were pressured to get married to produce a male heir for the family name.
The end of World War II flamed the sparks of change that would culminate in the Gender Revolution of the 1960s. During the era, women often had to work outside of the home because their husbands were overseas fighting in Europe. Many single women loved the feeling of freedom and saw that they could flourish and be happy living alone.
During the culture clash of the 1960s, women’s liberation, and the Equal Rights Amendment passage, more young people decided that they could have a lover without getting married and living in the same house.
Women began to take more jobs in traditionally male-dominated fields with great success. They founded their businesses and traveled around the world on their own. They made impressive accomplishments in the arts, math, and science as single women.
9 REASONS WHY MANY PEOPLE ARE HAPPIER BY STAYING SINGLE
Whether you are a woman or a man, you are a complete person in your own right. Lovers may compliment you, but you don’t need anyone to complete you. Does staying single cause any psychological harm, or does it provide some benefit?
Although you need to have social interaction to be healthy, is it necessary to live with others to do it? It just depends on the person. Here are some possible benefits of solo living.
1. YOU MAKE THE RULES
Remember when you were a kid at home and couldn’t wait to grow up and make your own house rules? Staying single gives you the privilege of making the rules without answering to anyone else. You can be as picky or as lax as you please.
If you want to stay out all night Friday and sleep the day away on Saturday, you have that option. You don’t have anyone waiting up for you or telling you what you should or shouldn’t do. If you want to have a nightcap with a special friend, it’s up to you.
2. MORE PERSONAL SPACE
When you live solo, you needn’t worry about sharing space with other people. Just imagine how wonderful it would be if all the closet space were yours. There wouldn’t be any arguments over who gets the top shelf and who gets the bottom one.
Plus, the bathroom will always be available, and you won’t have to wait in line. You can take leisurely baths without somebody pounding on the door. There would be plenty of hot water, fresh towels, and room for all your toiletries.
3. DECORATE YOUR WAY
Even the most devoted couples living together can clash on how to decorate the outside and inside of their home. It can be irritating to live with somebody who has completely different tastes in décor, and you must continuously compromise. What if you’ve always dreamed of a minimalist theme, and your partner is an eclectic hoarder?
Staying single allows you the freedom to deck out your place any way you choose. You don’t have to compromise or set aside room for anyone else’s things. You can change colors and styles around any time you want without asking for someone’s opinion.
4. NO MORE EXTRA MESSES
One of the biggest complaints of people who cohabitate is having to clean up each other’s messes. It’s mostly trying if you are a neat freak and your partner is a slob. While it may be remarkable that one of you is an aspiring chef, it’s not so great when the kitchen is a wreck.
As a single resident, the only messes you clean up will be your own. No more picking up wet towels from the bathroom floor or gathering up beer cans left on the coffee table. There will be no more stacks of crusty dishes or piles of dirty laundry in the bedroom.
On the flip side, maybe you grew up with chronic neat freaks, and you are the messy one. If you live by yourself, you needn’t bother doing the dishes when dinner is finished. You won’t need to answer anyone if you don’t want to make your bed in the mornings.
5. THE REMOTE IS YOURS
Don’t you hate it when you want to watch your favorite home design show, and your partner is binge-watching past seasons of the latest drama? The choices of television shows can often be a bone of contention for those who cohabitate.
When staying single, you are the remote ruler, and you can watch what you want whenever you want. If you choose, you can also enjoy some quiet time without somebody blaring the TV. Also, you have control over the stereo and other technology in your pad.
6. NO FIGHTING OVER THE THERMOSTAT
Do you feel like you are in a perpetual hot flash and your cold-natured partner cranks up the heat, or vice-versa? Your idea of having a good night’s sleep may include a mound of warm blankets, while your partner may only prefer a top sheet.
You can also open windows and doors as you please without aggravating the other person. There are no worries or compromises when you live on your own.
7. A ROOM OF YOUR OWN
Speaking of bedrooms, didn’t you get tired of sharing a room with your siblings as a kid? Staying single means that you have a bedroom all to yourself. Both sides of the bed are yours, and you can hog both sides of the bed and all the blankets.
Maybe you are like some people and can’t sleep without a fan, music, or the television playing. If that’s the case, it wouldn’t be easy if you lived with someone who needed total silence for sleeping.
It would be the same situation if one of you slept with a nightlight, and the other preferred complete darkness. If you live by yourself, you could read or watch shows in bed as late as you like.
8. NO PET DILEMMA
Everybody is not an animal person. Most pet people are usually divided between cats and dogs. Some individuals are happiest when they are surrounded by a whole menagerie of animals all over the house.
If you live by yourself, you call the shots when it comes to pets. You can have a cat or dog, or another pet to keep you company. If you have allergies or aren’t a pet person, you don’t have someone who insists on having many animals around the place.
9. LIVING SOLO CAN SAVE A LITTLE BIT OF CASH
People who are married or live together can save money on rent or a mortgage with two incomes. However, the cost of utilities and other services get higher with two or more people in a home. If you live by yourself, your bills may be lower, and you can save your money for other essential things. FINAL THOUGHTS ON STAYING SINGLE INSTEAD OF MARRYING BEFORE YOU ARE READY
Living alone does not mean that you have shunned society or are uninterested in love. It’s possible to enjoy a fulfilling love life and social calendar without sacrificing your private space. Staying single may give you the peace and quiet you want, and you can invite people to visit as you choose.
Until you find that special partner, do not compromise. Enjoy this time, staying single can be an enriching experience.